New Levels, New Devils

I was listening to Tamar Braxton talking to Steve Harvey about getting fired from The Real this morning and I heard a phrase that I absolutely identify with:

New Levels, New Devils

And sometimes the devil is calling from inside the house - sometimes you're your own worst enemy. I find myself being more worried, more anxious, more fearful the further along I go. When I walked into that writer's room that first week, I could feel every insecurity I felt come out. It multiplied my anxiety. I'm trying to live as anxiety free a life as I can. But that level of competition brings out something in all of us. It can be the best possible situation - which ours definitely was - and still you feel like you're not good enough. As the blessings multiply, so do the forces that threaten to bring us down. It's like we have to fight on the daily for ourselves.

Tamar and Steve were talking about people who come for you the higher you go - and there' s plenty of that. When one rises to the top, they become a target. That's why I stayed in the background for so long. I didn't want to be a target. But I was also hiding from the potential blessings that were out there waiting for me for so long. It was safer in the background. But there was also no risk, so no reward.

Now that I have the courage to step out there, I'm finding all sorts of obstacles. Most of them reside within, by the way. I don't have anyone else to blame. I'm feeling held back by myself. And I need to get over it. Because the same fearlessness that got me here is going to propel me further.

I am grateful for You Tube.
I am grateful for perspective.
I am grateful for a positive outlook.
I am grateful that I keep it moving.
I am grateful that I am taking care of my mind, body and soul.