Self Producing

I read this on HowlRound.  If you haven't checked it out, it's a great blog/website for playwrights to connect and for all people who are creating new work for the theatre.  It feels relevant.  It feels like a Town Hall meeting.  It feels like community.

I went back to pursuing my theatre work after a lot of time trying to break into TV because I was looking for a community.  That didn't mean that I was trading one for the other.  I believe they both have incredible purpose in my life.  But I needed a place where I could come and just chat with other folks about art.

In my former capacity in TV development, I went to the Humana Festival at the Actors Theatre of Louisville every year.  My boss through a huge party every year and I felt like I was the Babe to his Bill (the Paleys...Google them).  But I would go to those plays and feel an incredible sense of being on the outside looking in.  I would have the best conversations about art and theatre, but I would only have them for one or two weekends a year.  My life took me in a direction away from that and by that time I was already back to writing plays on more of a regular basis.  While I was really focused on TV, I was writing a new play every other year.  That might seem like enough for a lot of folks.  And it really does take years to develop a new play.  But I wanted to be working on multiple projects because I always get tired of something and need a distraction.  What better distraction than another play you had put down awhile ago and are ready to pick up again?

When I had enough material, I started submitting my plays again.  I got as far as being a finalist for the O'Neill a couple of years ago.  And that was terrific.  I was a semi-finalist for a couple of other things.  I have had play readings around town and nationally.  But it's still kind of an occasional thing.  Last year, I had an idea for a new play and while we were rehearsing it for a reading I was having, my best friend who is a TV actress said, "Let's produce this!"

I remember having a conversation with a friend of mine a couple of years ago who works for a big foundation that gives money to the theatre.  After many unsuccessful attempts to get my play into an annual theatre lab, he said that I should think about self-producing.  I was pissed!  Fuck you!  I felt like if there's nothing that he can do for someone like me, who has been a professional colleague and an "emerging playwright", then what the fuck is he and his organization doing?  I was clearly taking it personally.  But it also felt like there was no place for writers, with great pedigrees and education, but with no presence (yet) to get started.  The other explanation was that my plays suck eggs.  I don't think that's the case.

But when Alanna said that she wanted to produce the play, I thought that was a great idea.  I wanted more control over how my work is presented.  I don't want to wait around for someone with a checkbook or a place of position to anoint me.  Although, that's exactly what I had been doing.  I was giving up my power and then not feeling worthy.  We're still working on producing the play because these things take time.  But I feel empowered.  And I'd love to do more of it.

So I read this article on HowlRound this morning and thought it was great.  It speaks to how I'm feeling about the self-producing thing.  And it makes me feel like I'm not alone.  I'm a part of a community.

http://howlround.com/on-becoming-a-playwright-producer